How to navigate parents evenings with twins

Why parents’ evenings matter for each child

Parents’ evenings are a chance to hear how your children are getting on, not only academically but socially and emotionally too. When you have twins, triplets or more, it can sometimes feel easier to talk about them together but it’s important to ensure they each have their own appointment. If they are the same class, and teachers suggest a joint conversation, you might need to explain this to them.

Having separate appointments sends a clear message that each child is an individual, and that you expect feedback that matches their unique ways of learning and growing.

Planning parents’ evening appointments for twins

When appointment slips or online booking links arrive, ask for separate full-length slots for each child. If they share a teacher, you might find you’re offered one longer joint slot instead. It’s fine to say you’d prefer two appointments. You can explain that it helps you focus on each child and remember what’s discussed.

You might want the appointments to be back-to- back so you’re not hanging around all evening, but still clearly separate. At the start of each meeting, gently remind the teacher which child you’re talking about. It sounds obvious, but it helps everyone stay on track.

As your children move through school, they may have different teachers for different subjects. This can make it even harder to keep track of what’s said. Taking a small notebook, or using notes on your phone, can really help. You can jot down key points, next steps and anything you want to follow up later. Let the teacher know you’re taking notes so you can support your child at home.

Deciding when to talk about their twin relationship

Sometimes, parts of your children’s progress are very closely linked to their multiple birth relationship. This might include things like competitiveness, one child opting out because the other is more confident, or how they get on with other children in the class.

If that’s the case, it can be helpful to have a conversation that looks at both children together. However, parents’ evening appointments are often short and focused on academic progress. Trying to cover individual feedback and a detailed discussion about their twin relationship in one go can feel rushed.

You might find it works better to ask for a separate meeting, at another time, just to talk about the ‘twin side of things’. You can say you’d like some time to think about how their relationship is affecting learning, confidence or friendships. This gives you and the teacher space to explore patterns and plan supportive strategies without watching the clock.

It can also be useful to include your children in some of these wider conversations, especially as they get older. They may have their own ideas about what helps or what feels difficult when they’re in the same class, group or team.

Making the most of what teachers share

Going into parents’ evening with a few key questions can help you get the most from each appointment. You might like to ask about how your child learns best, how they join in with others and what small changes could help them thrive.

You could say that you’re trying to support both twins as individuals and you’d value any suggestions the teacher has. This invites the teacher to notice differences between your children in a positive way, rather than comparing who’s ‘better’ at something.

If there are things you’re worried about, such as one child being overshadowed, say so early in the meeting. That way, the teacher can share what they see in class and you can explore ideas together. If you run out of time, you can ask for a follow-up chat, phone call or email. You don’t have to squeeze everything into one short slot.

Leaving the parents’ evening feeling clear and confident

It’s easy to leave parents’ evenings with your head full of information and your brain struggling to separate what was said about each child. Booking separate appointments, taking notes and planning a dedicated meeting about their twin relationship can make a big difference.

You know your children best and you’re allowed to ask for what helps you understand and support them. If you feel unsure or muddled afterwards, you can always contact the school to clarify points for each child.

Over time, you’ll find a rhythm that works for your family, your children and their teachers. Clear, calm communication and a focus on each child as an individual will help you leave parents’ evenings feeling more confident, better informed and ready to support your twins as they grow.