Do twins develop a special language to communicate with each other?

Speech and language development in twins, triplets or more

You might wonder if your twins, triplets or more have a private language that only they understand. Many families notice their children chatting away together and seeming to know exactly what the other means.

Research shows twins, triplets or more are more likely than single-born children to have mild language delays around age two, especially boys and identical twins. Many late talkers catch up by preschool age, but because some children don’t, it’s important to seek advice early if you’re worried.

However, speech and language difficulties can sometimes be linked with slower overall development and later learning challenges. That’s why it’s important to notice any concerns early and feel confident about asking for help. You’re not being over-anxious; you’re advocating for your children.

Why multiples may experience language delays

Studies also show that speech and language difficulties are a little more common in twins, triplets or more than in single-born children. This is seen most often in the toddler and preschool years. This is partly because multiples are more likely to experience things that affect all children’s language development, such as prematurity or complications during pregnancy or birth.

Family life with more than one child the same age also shapes how language develops. Your children may spend more time with each other than with other family members. This means they hear a lot of immature speech sounds, which can be charming but not always helpful for learning clear words.

Because the care demands are greater, each child often gets less individual attention than a singleton, and for shorter bursts. Parents might talk to one child while looking after the other, or one child may start speaking for both to keep things moving. Multiples also have to compete for time to get their point across, so quieter children can be overshadowed.

Rates of postnatal depression are higher in parents of multiples.(LINK to State of Nation Report) Low mood, exhaustion and anxiety can sometimes reduce how much adults talk, sing or play. None of this is about poor parenting. These are natural pressures that come with caring for more than one child of the same age.

There are positives too. Having a built-in conversational partner from birth gives your children rich, early experience of turn-taking, sharing, disagreeing and making up. With a few simple tweaks to their daily environment, you can usually protect these benefits while reducing the risks.

People sometimes talk about ‘twin language’. Research shows that while some twins do develop private ways of talking, it’s uncommon for them to use a completely separate language as their main way of communicating. More often, each child simply becomes very skilled at understanding the other’s immature speech patterns, which is a normal part of growing up together. When a private language continues to dominate and children aren’t using words that other people can understand, it can be a sign of ongoing language difficulties and is a good reason to seek specialist advice.

Practical ways to support your children’s language

Language delays in multiples are often linked to reduced social and language opportunities rather than an underlying disability. That means you can usually make a big difference by gently changing everyday routines.

You might want to try:

• Spending some one-to-one time each day talking with each child
• Focusing fully on the child you’re speaking to and keeping eye contact
• Turning off the television, radio and other background noise for some time in the day
• Looking at books with each child on their own and naming what you see together
• Singing nursery rhymes and simple songs that involve actions and repetition
• Repeating what your child says in the correct form, without pressure to copy you
• Encouraging older siblings, friends and family to talk with each child individually
• Making sure one child doesn’t always speak for the others and inviting everyone’s opinion
• Helping your children build individual friendships and have some separate playdates
• Playing games that build listening, attention and imaginative play, such as pretend shops or tea parties - for more play ideas with your toddlers you can take a look at our Play Booklet [Premium Members only]

You can also help others tell your children apart, for example by using their names clearly, sharing small differences in appearance or style and gently correcting people who mix them up. Feeling recognised as an individual helps children feel more confident to speak up.

When to seek help and support

It’s important to remember that having multiples with a language delay is not a reflection on your parenting. Caring for twins, triplets or more brings unique challenges. You’re doing a demanding job, often on very little sleep.

If you’re worried about how your children’s speech or language is developing, trust your instincts and seek advice. You can call our helpline (LINK), contact our Professional Referral Service (LINK) for one-off support from one of our volunteer Speech and Language Therapists or talk to your health visitor or GP. Charities such as Afasic (LINK) support children with language delay, and you can search for a local private Speech and Language Therapist through ASLTIP (LINK) (Association of Speech and Language Therapists in Independent Practice).

If your child or children have additional support needs, you might like to join our online community support group (LINK) for parents and carers of twins, triplets or more. Connecting with others who understand your situation can make you feel less alone and give you practical ideas that work in real family life.

Early support, a calm, language-rich environment and your ongoing encouragement can all help your children find their voices, both together and as individuals.

Further reading on twins and language development

Research papers exploring twin–singleton language differences, developmental trajectories, and “twin talk.”

Thorpe K, Rutter M, Greenwood R, et al (2003) ‘Twins as a natural experiment to study the causes of mild language delay: I: Design; twin–singleton differences in language, and obstetric risks’ – Journal of Child Psychology and Psychiatry.

D’haeseleer E, Geenens E, Parmentier S, Van Lierde K (2016) ‘Language development of three- to twelve-year-old twins compared to singletons’ – Folia Phoniatrica et Logopaedica.

Bakker P (1987) ‘Autonomous languages of twins’ – Acta Geneticae Medicae et Gemellologiae.