Balancing your career and family after having twins

Hayfa, a mother of triplets, believes that it’s possible to have a career after having multiples.“You can still have a career after having twins, triplets or quads but it helps to see it as an investment,” she said. Her return to work after maternity leave was influenced not just by financial factors but also by her passion for her job. “ It made financial sense for me to return to work at least temporarily because my employer’s maternity pay was more generous than the minimum. Plus, I only needed to work for three months after maternity leave,” she explained. However, for Hayfa, it wasn’t simply about the immediate financial return—it was about long-term benefits.

“I also loved my job and believed I could fit it around family life,” Hayfa shared. She viewed her return to work as an investment in her career, gaining experience and contributing to her pension, even though her salary went entirely towards childcare.

“Until the Covid pandemic happened, all my salary went towards childcare but I saw it as an investment and not a cost,” she said. In the end, it paid off. When her children turned three, she moved to a more exciting and better-paying job. “I use ‘job’ here as shorthand for paid work. Parenting is also a job but it isn’t paid employment,” she added. This approach allowed her to balance both her family and career ambitions.

Evaluating the decision to return to work

Hayfa offers advice to others considering returning to work after having children. She emphasised the importance of carefully evaluating the balance between career and family life. “If you really like your job, my advice would be to treat it like a family investment,” she said.

She encourages parents, particularly in two-parent households, to consider both partners’ careers, income, and savings when making the decision. “That means if you’re a two-parent household, both you and your partner’s jobs, income, and savings need to be included in your decision as to whether you can afford to return to work.”

She suggests asking important questions before making a decision. How easy would it be to get another job with similar pay and conditions if you left? What are the career development prospects if you stay? What training and learning opportunities are available? Are the pension, holidays, and benefits good? How supportive are your colleagues? What flexible working options exist? These questions help guide individuals through the process of making a balanced decision that aligns with both career goals and family priorities.

Practical strategies for making childcare affordable

One of the biggest challenges parents face when returning to work after having multiple children is the cost of childcare. Hayfa offers some practical ideas that helped her family and others in similar situations. "Free childcare for working parents" and "free childcare from family" are among her first suggestions. “If you live in a two-parent household, stagger working hours so parents take turns caring for children is another helpful strategy,” she said. These flexible arrangements can significantly reduce childcare costs, allowing parents to balance work and family life more effectively.

Hayfa also shared examples from her network to illustrate different ways families manage the demands of work and childcare. “Two of my friends work part-time while their husbands look after the children at home. They have family nearby for support,” she explained. Another triplet mum took a career break after maternity leave before returning to work part-time, with the help of her husband and in-laws. “A triplet mum friend took a year’s career break following her maternity leave before returning to work part-time. Her husband works full-time. When they’re both working, either her in-laws or nursery look after their children,” Hayfa said. “Another triplet mum I know prepared for a career change by studying while looking after her children. Her husband works full-time,” she explained.

Finding the right balance

Ultimately, Hayfa’s advice is about finding a balance between career and family life. “These approaches may not work for everyone, but if you want to stay in work, think about what the ideal balance is between your career and family life, and consider all your household finances and childcare options,” she said.

Every family’s situation is different, but by exploring flexible working options, utilising family support, and considering career investments, it’s possible to maintain both a fulfilling career and a happy family life. Hayfa’s journey is a testament to the idea that, with the right planning, families can manage the challenges of working and raising multiples.