At Twins Trust, we want to make sure you have the information you need to support bereaved parents. Clear, accurate information can help families find the right support, at a pace that feels manageable for them.
You can use these resources to learn more and share reliable information with families:
- Certificates of Birth: parents can apply for a baby loss certificate if their baby, or babies, died before 24 weeks of pregnancy
- Twin and Multiple Birth Bereavement Care Guidance: download and read our guidance which was written in collaboration with the National Bereavement Care Pathway
- Our bereavement research shares what families told us about the care they received, with learning for healthcare professionals and support for families
- Sign up to our newsletter for updates from the Twins Trust Bereavement Service
- Read about The Neonatal Butterfly Project, which explores the lived experience of baby loss in a multiple pregnancy
- Practical tips: download our Tips for Healthcare Professionals leaflet for practical tips to support families through the bereavement process
Speaking to bereaved families
This guidance will help you approach sensitive conversations with compassion and clarity.
When parents have lost a baby, or babies, they may have many questions and want clear answers about what has happened. It's important that they can access reliable information easily after the death of one or more babies, so have key information ready to talk through with them. Be mindful of the parent's medical history and any previous bereavement, as this may affect the support they need.
Language matters when you're supporting parents. Use clear, compassionate words when sharing unexpected news, during birth, while making memories and at follow-up appointments.
Your words can have a lasting impact. If they're still pregnant with a surviving twin or triplets, think carefully about how you refer to the baby who has died. Many families want the baby who has died to be acknowledged, including using their name if they've shared it with you.
As a healthcare professional, you can help parents through memory making with their baby or babies. Offer gentle guidance and explain what's possible, without rushing them.
Where appropriate, give parents as many opportunities as you can. This might include photographs, holding their baby, bathing and dressing them, hand and footprints or a lock of hair. You could also offer other close family members the chance to meet the baby, if the parents want this.
When parents are bereaved, it can help to signpost them to support groups where they'll find others who understand the death of a baby in a multiple pregnancy. You can also tell them about Twins Trust's Bereavement Service, so they have the information if they decide they want to use it. Our support is available to anyone who has experienced the death of a twin, triplet or more.
At the time a baby dies, it can be hard for families to take in information. Even when you share details of support, they may not remember or feel able to follow it up straight away. A check-in later can be very valuable and a chance to remind families what support is available.
Twins Trust has a range of leaflets to support families through bereavement, including our Navigating Grief booklet.
Counselling can help many bereaved families. If it’s appropriate, stay in touch during the first year, for example through the bereavement midwife or hospital counselling team.
Checking in can give families another chance to hear about the support available, when they may be more able to take it in. For more information on counselling and other support, visit our bereavement support page.
We've spoken to families who've shared comments they heard from healthcare professionals after a bereavement.
- "Do you think you'll have a second child?" (from a midwife at the six-month checkup with one surviving twin)
- "You're lucky it was twins. So many people come in here and leave with no baby." (from a NICU nurse)
- "Imagine if you had to carry two of those!" (from a doctor to a bereaved parent, about bringing car seats into an appointment)
- "So here you are with your singleton pregnancy." (from a doctor to a mum who had lost the other twin to TTTS)
- "Take care with this baby." (from a midwife to a woman who had lost a twin to TTTS)
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